


Hurt What's Mine

by Kissa



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Action & Romance, BAMF Jace Wayland, Caring Alec Lightwood, Deal With the Devil, Getting Together, Good Parabatai Jace Wayland, M/M, Parabatai, Parabatai Feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:15:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27261844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kissa/pseuds/Kissa
Summary: Alec becomes the target of a very powerful demon, who enslaves him for his unique power. Jace and Magnus have to work together to free Alec and to prevent the world from being taken over by demons. Along the way, Magnus discovers there's more to Jace than quips and arrogance, and Jace learns sometimes it pays to trust others.
Relationships: Alec Lightwood/Jace Wayland, Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood/Jace Wayland
Comments: 11
Kudos: 52





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Nadja_Lee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nadja_Lee/gifts).



> Fic based on a suggestion @Nadja_Lee made in a comment under another fic of mine. I ran with it and while it didn't turn up as dark as I hoped, I am still pleased with it. Many thanks to @Polarnacht and @Jessa for their very interesting insights on the characters, which directly contributed to me getting this done. <3

Angel blood manifests differently in every Nephilim.    
  
Some get extraordinary powers that make them great, legendary warriors. Others are just really good with children or scared animals. Some make plants grow faster and bigger.    
  
Only Alec grew up thinking he has nothing special about him. Nothing at all. He can fight well enough. His arrows hit the mark often enough. But he’s not pretty or confident like his sister, nor ambitious like his mother. He’s not a good strategist like his father. He’s not even as into martial arts as Hodge is.    
  
He’s just… there.    
  
They never say it out loud, but he can feel his parents’ disappointment. They are ashamed they got the one kid who is not special in any way. 

Luckily, when Alec is twelve, his parents bring another boy home. He gets forgotten, but at least the pressure is off - in some ways.    
  
Jace Wayland is special in every possible way. He’s beautiful, fast, strong, cunning, manipulative if he needs to. The perfect Shadowhunter, with the makings of greatness that will make the history books.    
  
But Jace is also lonely and comes from a really abusive home. He never knew what it’s like to have siblings, to not have to work hard for every meal, to hear praise and to not get beaten for every little mistake.    
  
Alec sees that the new boy, for all his qualities, has one big hole in his heart. And he decides, then and there, that he will make it his personal mission to mend it. 

Jace and Alec like each other just fine, and Isabelle accepts Jace into the family too. She is all too eager to measure up against him and find out how to beat the unbeatable warrior.    
  
After the first week in the Institute, Maryse orders Jace to take the room in the bell tower. He has to clean it first, because no one uses that place regularly and it got dusty over time. His initial room was between her and Robert’s bedroom and those of Alec and Izzy.    
  
But Jace has such terrifying nightmares every night, he spends hours screaming and not waking, locked in those nightmares and unable to tear himself away. And if Jace is sleeping, no one else in the building is. So Maryse sends him to the bell tower.    
  
Alec goes to help him clean the old room, and soon they are joined by Izzy. It doesn’t take long and they make the room into a cozy place. Alec even brings wood to burn in the fireplace and Izzy brings a scented candle. 

The screaming doesn’t stop, it’s just more distant.    
  
Until one night, when Alec, instead of going directly to bed, goes up to the bell tower with a book.    
  
Jace is already settled in bed and Alec asks if he can read to him for a bit. Give his mind something else to think about instead of Michael Wayland’s A+ parenting techniques.

Even though Alec brought a horror novel, his even, calming voice lulls Jace to sleep. And this time Jace starts dreaming of deep dark forests, full of big scary monsters. But he’s armed this time. And Alec is there too, with his bow and quiver full of arrows, to watch his six.    
  
There’s no screaming that night.    
  
***

Jace has the brilliant idea of him and Alec becoming parabatai. Their parents have nothing against it, except Maryse telling them to prepare extra well for the tests so they pass with flying colours and do not shame the Lightwood name. She already gave up on her doormat of a child and thinks that at least by association, he might still accomplish something worthy of mention just by being Jace’s parabatai.    
  
She is also aware of how awkward and lacking any finesse and appeal her eldest is, so not even marrying him off to someone from a powerful family to forge a strategic alliance is an option. At least, if he becomes Jace’s shadow, people won’t wonder why no one picked him to marry, as parabatai are notoriously attached to each other.    
  
Although, and Maryse notes this with contentment, where Alec lacks, Jace exceeds. Jace can charm the pants off anyone, and he’s not even a man yet, but there’s something about him that sparks desire in everyone he sets his eye on.    
  
In time, it becomes apparent that Alec’s presence has a calming effect on Jace. And not just on Jace. He manages to avert an entire war between Seelies and Vampires by leading a civil conversation and not letting it get out of hand. Soon, the inflamed spirits calm down, the fires of hate are extinguished and the Shadow World is safe.    
  
It takes the Seelie Queen showing interest in Alec’s skill for Maryse and Robert to recognise it as such. In their eyes, it’s as useless a skill as there can be, since it can’t be shown off.    


But, since now it’s apparent Alec does have a special gift, one that also means everyone in the Institute can sleep without being haunted by Jace’s blood curdling screams, Maryse tells Alec to go sleep in Jace’s bed from then on. He can keep his room where he has all his clothes and personal items, but he is to always make sure that Jace can really rest, so that she and everyone else in the Institute can as well.   
  
This little gift doesn’t come for free though. It costs Alec his own energy to soothe others. Sometimes, when he has to do it a lot and for a long time, it gives him migraines and nosebleeds. But usually it just makes him feel drained.    
  
Jace, who doesn’t like being a gun that always has a silencer on, starts looking for ways he can help Alec learn to control his abilities and to find an off switch for them.  
  
They keep looking for a long time, until a warlock advertising her services on the internet draws Jace’s attention.    
  
She just moved to New York and has opened a practice on a mundane street. She has very good reviews, and the ones from Shadowhunters can be recognised by the wording. Her prices are affordable and she seems nice enough. And she wouldn’t have opened a practice if she wasn’t approved by the High Warlock, so Jace books an appointment.    
  
She takes one look at Alec and smiles knowingly, but goes through the motions as usual in order to reassure her clients.    
  
Her name is Monique De Relicta, kind of exotic, but aren’t all warlock names like that?    
  
“I see what you have a lot in my line of work. I’ve travelled the world high and low, by now I know what it takes to control your gift. However, the solution is not ideal.” She tells Alec. “And you have to agree to it. Otherwise I won’t do it, if you deem it too risky.”    
  
“What is it, then?” Alec wants to know.    
  
“I can give you a sign that I will paint on your skin with a special ink. It will fade soon after you got it, but it will be there forever, putting a damper on your powers. They will become very subtle and you’ll only be able to use them to a much smaller extent. Almost like a regular mundane, you will have to learn to do without the effects of your powers that you enjoy.”    
  
“So does that mean no more migraines and nose bleeds?” Jace asks. 

“Like I said, the power will be greatly diminished, and so should the effects.”    
  
“I want to do it. I want to be a Shadowhunter again and not feel tired from the smallest, shortest of missions.”    
  
“Then let me speak to my secretary, she will bring you a form to fill so we can get on with it. You know, I have to keep full records, otherwise the mundane review board will send an audit before you’re out the door.”    
  
She returns shortly with the forms and Alec fills them out meticulously.    
  
“You might have loved ones turn on you or abandon you.” Monique says. “That is normal, as people who used to enjoy your power and benefit from it will notice its withdrawal and unconsciously seek something else to replace it with.”    
  
“Sounds like a them problem,” Alec shrugged, looking at Jace.    
  
They were grown up enough that they no longer needed to sleep closely every night, and Jace even spent some nights away from the Institute, not having had any bad side effects or nightmares.    
  
Jace nodded. From his side, it was alright. He just wanted Alec to go back to his old self, where he didn’t only exist for others. 

Alec handed Monique the signed papers and she put them on her desk, going to retrieve a glass pen and an ink pot from one of the many cabinets behind her desk.    
  
“Where would you like me to draw?” She asked, waiting for Alec to decide.    
  
“You said it fades soon after it’s done? Then here is just fine,” Alec pulled his shirt lower to expose the upper part of his right pec, right under the collarbone.    
  
The magic that gathered around her hand as she drew the sign was not blue, as Jace expected, but purple. The important thing was that it wasn’t red, so that made it alright. 

Monique also said an incantation as she drew: “ _ Meus es nunc, donec ego dimittam vos, quod ego non.”  _   
  
“There you go. All done. I made a real pretty one this time. To go with a pretty bearer.” She added, smiling at Alec and pinching his cheek, then caressing it.    
  
Jace looked at the tangled letters which formed the sign. He didn’t recognise them, as he wasn’t very knowledgeable about arcane calligraphy, but he did memorise the look of the sign and made a mental note to look for it later.   
  
***   


_(three months later)_   
  
“You did WHAT?!!!” Magnus yelped, looking at the receipt from Monique’s practice, on which Jace had drawn the sign Alec now carried.   
  
“What’s wrong? I’m not the first Shadowhunter to use a warlock’s services. My parents use yours lots.” Alec said, downing Jace’s Long Island Ice Tea in one go when Jace, currently pacing in front of the window of Magnus’ living room, wasn’t looking.    
  
“And you couldn’t send me a fire message and ask me if it was a legit practice?” Magnus said.    
  
“You always talk about money and billing right away and the last few times you offered to...you know! I’m not interested!” Alec sank back in his armchair. “At least, not if you put it that way.” He softened and looked at Magnus with puppy eyes. “Did I screw up badly?”   
  
“You didn’t screw up, I saw her online! It was my idea to go.” Jace cut in.    
  
“Excuse me, why did you get involved?” Magnus asked.    
  
“Because Alec is my parabatai and his power was sucking the life out of him. I wanted him to be happy and his full glowing self again. Because a very important date is approaching and I’ve been planning stuff.”    
  
“What stuff?” Both Magnus and Alec asked.    
  
“Not relevant at this time. Magnus, let’s focus on Alec for now?”    
  
Magnus conjured another cocktail, which he drank right away.    
  
“Monique De Relicta is a beloved pseudonym used by the demon Abaddon when she does deals with mortals. It literally means Reliquished to the Devil. One of her other names is “The Destroyer” and she has the biggest angel kill count in all the realms of Hell.”   
  
Both Alec and Jace went very quiet.    
  
“But… but what would she want with Alec? Everyone always said how his power is useless unless something happens first, so he can help with that. Like he did with my nightmares.” Jace wanted to know.    
  
“Foolish, young Shadowhunter. Alec’s gift is very useful for demons, because drawing on his power, Abaddon can bind the essence of demons to mortal bodies and make them almost all-powerful in the mundane world. And the reason Alec hasn’t been himself is because she has drained him constantly for these three months. The only reason he is still alive is because you’re his parabatai and he draws on your life force.” Magnus explained. “Now, the direct consequence of that is there are a multitude of greater demons loose in the world, and we can’t know who they are or where, because thanks to Alec’s power, their energy signatures are indistinguishable from mundane ones. We’ll still be chasing after them one by one by the time Abaddon opens the gates of all of Hell and lets it spill onto our world.”    
  
“Ok, how do we reverse this? Remove that seal from Alec?” Jace asked, watching his parabatai, who had dozed off in the armchair, the alcohol from the one cocktail he had drunk having knocked his exhausted body right out.   
  
“Did she say anything while drawing it?”   
  
“Only that it was a pretty sign for a pretty bearer. And then she caressed Alec’s cheek.”    
  
“I mean, in Latin?”    
  
“She said ‘ _ Meus es nunc, donec ego dimittam vos, quod ego non.’  _ but that’s standard warlock fare, isn’t it? _ ”  _   
  
“No it’s not, those are binding words. Spoken by a greater demon, no less, and they mean ‘now you are mine until I release you, which I won’t.’” Magnus explained. “So, either Abaddon dies, or Alec does.”    
  
“Fine. I know what to do then.” Jace said, his eyes flaring gold.    
  
“No, Jace you don’t understand. Abaddon can’t be killed so easily. She is one of the four pillars of Hell.”    
  
“Then Hell will have to deal with being a tripod.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jace has to kill an unkillable demon in order to free Alec.  
> Mainly Jalec, with hints of Jagnus and Malace at the end.

Jace had listened carefully to Magnus’ tips on how to kill Abaddon. It wasn’t easy and normally he would have to go to the Hell realm where she lived and battle her there, which wasn’t a very clever thing to do, since runes and angelic powers didn’t work there.  
  
Jace had another idea. Very messed up and something that would cost him everything and nothing at the same time. And he would never tell Alec what he had done.  
  
The last three months had been a literal descent into hell. Jace had watched Alec slowly fray and start to vanish from the world. Sure, there was a body that looked like him walking the halls of the Institute, following him on missions. But his Alec, his best friend, his parabatai, his most beloved person in the whole world - he was gone. In his stead, a meek, yes-saying, always nodding, always following along poor copy remained.  
  
And the change had made Jace see just how much he loved Alec. And in what way. His father had taught him that to love was to destroy, but if he looked at his feelings close enough, he knew that was not the case with Alec. Just knowing that he was going to meet Alec someplace; slipping into bed with Alec and having a heavy arm drape over him and pull him close - even those simple things filled Jace with butterflies and sunshine. Even thinking of being close with Alec, and them doing anything as long as it was together, filled Jace with boundless joy.  
  
His plan would work if he did, Jace thought, and he picked up the phone.  
  
A cheerful, customer service female voice greeted him at the other end.  
  
“You’ve reached the practice of Dr. De Relicta, how may I help you?”  
  
“I’d like to set an appointment with the doctor.Towards the end of the day, if possible? My name is Jace Herondale.”  
  
“Alright, I’ll pencil you right in. She happens to be in today, if not, the next available slot is in two weeks.”  
  
“Today, by all means. This cannot wait.” Jace said.  
  
Nothing could wait. In two more weeks, Abaddon could deploy her plan of taking over the world and opening the gates of hell, and then all would be lost.  
  
“Alright, then she’ll be expecting you. Your appointment starts at five thirty.”  
  
Jace thanked the secretary and went to shower and make himself presentable.  
  
***  
  
“Jace! What a lovely surprise! I mean, I hope everything is alright? How’s Alec?”  
  
“Oh Alec’s fine, we haven’t spoken since right after the meeting with you, but he went to Idris with his mother and she is very pleased with him, for the first time since they adopted me.”  
  
He wasn’t lying. Maryse absolutely loved the meek, boneless version of Alec that followed orders to the letter.  
  
Only now, Alec was at Magnus’ loft, in a trance-like stasis that Magnus had put him in so he wouldn’t slip away while Jace dealt with Abaddon, something for which he would need his full powers and life force to carry out.  
  
“Then what is the problem?” She asked. “You said it couldn’t wait. Oh those are lovely! For me? Thank you.” She added, accepting the big basket of calla lilies Jace had brought and putting it on the wide window sill of her office.  
  
“I couldn’t wait. I wanted to thank you in person for helping Alec, giving me my life back, and setting me free.” Jace said, smiling and opening his jacket.  
  
“Oh? Tell me more. I am always interested to hear how my work touches the lives of the Shadowhunters I help.” Monique coaxed, watching Jace open his jacket and slowly, unashamedly checking him out, her eyes settling on the three open buttons of his white shirt and the little bit of skin they revealed.  
  
“Well you know. Having Alec around meant I could never be angry and let it play out. Or be as violent as I wanted in a fight. Sometimes it feels good to just… destroy and then sit back and enjoy your good work.”  
  
“Absolutely. Jace, you and I seem to have a lot more in common than I thought. Would you perhaps be interested in staying a while longer so we can… talk our fill? We can go upstairs, to my loft.”  
  
“Nothing would please me more.” Jace said, a knowing smile spreading across his face.  
  
“Let me tell my secretary I am done for today.”  
  
***  
  
If he allowed himself to forget for a moment that she was one of the most feared demons in all creation, Jace couldn’t tell there was anything different to the woman in his arms.  
  
It was a thing of wonder that he had been able to get hard when so much fear and the knowledge that if he messed up, all would be lost were pressing on his mind. But the reality was, Jace had been raised by a proper monster, one whose abuse had been so bad, that it made Jace perform the best under the most pressure. He both hated and loved that fact about himself, how perfectly he was able to play the part of the corrupt soul and of the man who sold everything he loved in one heartbeat.  
  
He watched Monique/Abaddon ride him with a carefully composed mix of adoration and feral hunger. When he felt she was close, he wrapped a hand around her neck, not too tightly, and pushed her back until she was on the bed and he was kneeling on the bed, leaning over her, fucking her harder and deeper, growling low in his throat from the exertion.  
  
It happened soon enough.  
  
She came around him with a sharp gasp, clearly not having expected to. Her eyes went completely pitch black and she stared up at Jace.  
  
But instead of coming and rolling off of her, he raised his right hand, fingers curled into a claw, and thrust it down into her chest.  
  
The demon Abaddon saw a stupid little mortal hold her heart in his hand.  
  
But all was not lost.  
  
She was far from dead.  
  
She could still turn this around.  
  
“What are you doing? You know you can’t kill me. Mortal.” She spat.  
  
“I’m counting on it, love.” Jace said, reaching for his jeans and taking out a purple fabric bag.  
  
He emptied the contents of the bag in the hole he had made in Abaddon’s chest. It was regular salt crystals, a fistful of them.  
  
“I don’t need you. I bury you. I forget you.” Jace said, getting out of the bed and dragging Abaddon’s body to the floor.  
  
He was still holding her pulsing heart, dark red blood seeping down his arm.  
  
Around them, it felt as though all of Hell had emptied and many demons had gathered to watch, none daring to come defend their ruler. The walls of the building had disappeared to reveal all the legions of Hell that Abaddon commanded having come to bear witness.  
  
Jace’s eyes and runes lit up gold as he repeated his earlier words.  
  
“I don’t need you. I bury you. I forget you.” He said, his voice much darker than before. “There are certain things you do not touch. One of them is Alec. Hurt what's mine, see what you get if you do.”  
  
He didn’t care all of Hell watched him as he took himself in hand and peed all over the body at his feet.  
  
Abaddon let out a blood curdling scream and her body began to disintegrate, like a log finally turning to ashes in a fireplace.  
  
“Magnus, now.” Jace said, and the warlock portaled in, opening another portal.  
  
They exchanged a look of encouragement and Jace took a bite from the heart in his hand. Then another, and another.   
  
“I don’t need you. I bury you. I forget you.” He paused to say, completing the ritual.  
  
When he was nearly finished, Magnus sent Abaddon’s body through the portal, closing it behind her with a muttered, “bye, bitch.”  
  
Around them, the demons retreated in silence, and the room returned to normal.  
  
Only Jace looked like something out of a horror movie, covered in blood, naked and his runes and eyes still glowing gold.  
  
The moment finally over, he collapsed.  
  
Magnus caught him with his magic and held him carefully, not caring he was staining his clothes.  
  
Jace had successfully carried out what he, Magnus, knew for sure he wasn’t capable of. Jace had had the idea of luring Abaddon to their world instead of going to Hell. And he had carried out the ritual that demons, warlocks, Shadowhunters and angels of the past hadn’t been able to.  
  
He found himself gently running his hand through Jace’s hair, trying to soothe him back to normal.  
  
“Are you going to be alright?” He asked, and Jace nodded, looking tired. “If you notice strange powers or effects from eating the heart, please tell me, alright? It’s important. But now that she’s gone, there should be no consequences.”  
  
Jace nodded.  
  
“Let’s get out of here. Alec needs you.” Magnus added, portaling them both back to his loft.  
  
Before he went to see Alec, Jace showered and put on some clean clothes he had brought along, expecting to get things done and get to this point.  
  
He also thanked Magnus for everything. Magnus had also had to put his charms to work and convince the secretary he was from the architecture studio and he absolutely needed to take photographs of the doctor’s loft for an audit the firm was getting. The secretary, a poorly disguised shapeshifting demon, had to let him, buried under all the legalese and the stacks of official looking documents Magnus had brought. And all that just so Magnus could portal in when it mattered, to help Jace.  
  
Showered and cleaned up, Jace saw a more composed version of himself in the mirror. He had wounded his soul in a way that would never heal, but all things considered, it was a small price to pay to get Alec back.  
  
He knelt next to the recliner Alec rested on.  
  
His parabatai looked like he was barely hanging on by a thread. His skin was ashen and clammy to the touch and his heartbeat was inaudible.  
  
“We did it, Alec. Magnus and I, we took care of Abaddon. She’s gone. You’re free now. Please come back to me. To us. We need you.”  
  
He began to cry, realising that maybe it was still too late and they were going to lose Alec because they hadn’t moved quickly enough.  
  
Magnus was sitting close by, giving him some space, but he could hear that the warlock was trying hard to cry silently.  
  
Jace tried reciting the Parabatai oath, but even to that, Alec didn’t respond. 

“I think we should let him go and let him finally rest. We’re too late.” Magnus said, his magic having searched for a spark within Alec, finding none.  
  
“NO!” Jace exploded. “This… this can’t be! Alec, I know you can hear me, you stubborn bastard, if you won’t come back for us, because we need you, then come back for yourself!” Tears were streaming down his face and by this point, he was ugly-crying like a child, not caring what he looked like. “Come back for the good things! You’ve only tasted my misery, my nightmares and my anger. Don’t go without feeling my joy, my hope, my love! Those are yours more than any shitty-ass emotion, because you cause them! Next week is going to be fifteen years since we met and I want to take you out and tell you that I’ve loved you since the day I met you. And I can’t do that if you’re dead, Alec.”  
  
Magnus was already walking out the door, giving Jace room to accept his grief after even his very passionate words wouldn’t work.  
  
But as he nearly rounded the corner, he heard Alec’s voice say one word.  
  
“Idiot.”  
  
Jace just collapsed with his forehead against Alec’s chest.  
  
“You are so melodramatic. Waiting until I’m almost fully gone to say something.” Alec chided, but the smile he gave Jace showed he didn’t really mean it. “What did I miss?”  
  
“Magnus and I took out a superboss level demon.” Jace said, uncomfortably sliding onto the recliner next to Alec and wrapping him in his arms, unable to hold back from kissing his forehead, his eyelids, his cheeks, his nose tip, his jaw, and finally his lips. “And I’d do it all over again if the reward is you looking at me like this.”  
  
They exchanged a deeper kiss, promising each other a lot more for a later hour, but for now Alec tore himself away and sat up, going after Magnus. 

“Thank you for everything. We keep causing you great headaches and you are nothing but gracious and helpful.”  
  
Magnus enveloped Alec in a fond look.  
  
“I’ve grown attached to you, Alexander. And lately, Jace has quite grown on me too. I’m glad to see you’re back.”  
  
“Is there any way we could get some food? I’m starving.” Alec said, looking at Jace to see if he was in or not.  
  
“Yeah my last meal wasn’t exactly gourmet, I could go for something yummy.” Jace said.  
  
“Then how about I invite you two for some fresh fattoush?” Magnus said. “In Beirut, of course.”  
  
“Bring it. And bring your wallet too, I feel like I could eat a horse plus side dishes.” Alec said.   
  
Magnus opened the portal and expected the two Shadowhunters to hold hands and follow him. Instead, Jace and Alec came up on either side of him, each taking one of his hands. 

“Alright, this is fine too.” He said, trying to downplay his excitement before they walked through, together. 

  
(the end) 

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoyed this fic, please leave kudos and a comment. Thank you <3


End file.
